College Parenting on Summer Break

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Final exams are coming, and shortly afterward, college kids will be coming back home for the summer break.

Students come home soon for summer break, and if it’s your first summer after your student left the nest, you may be wondering what to expect.

1.     Exhaustion is normal for a few days after final exams. Many students have been studying day and night for weeks. It’s not unusual to crash out for a few days.

2.     Don’t expect the teenager who left in the fall to come home a full-fledged adult by the first summer. Kids will revert to their default settings in their parents home. Realistically, your child is probably going to lie around and watch TV or play video games.

3.     If you’re expecting productive behavior over the summer, make it clear from the beginning. Do you want your student to get a job, or help out around the house? Don’t think he’ll do those things automatically. Make it clear what you expect from the get go.

4.     You’ll be annoyed. You’ve been missing your kid all year, and looking forward to having him home for the summer. But it won’t be all sunshine and roses. Expect to feel ignored, disrespected, and even used. Let go of your perfect images, and expect misunderstandings and growth opportunities as you cross this new threshold.

5.     You’re on the road to separation, but you aren’t there yet. If your student is still spending summers at home, she’s not grown and gone from the nest yet. She is still a kid in many ways. You have more ground to cover before she’s actually on her own.

Posted on April 30, 2018 by Melissa Deuter.